Mexican Cherry : health

Today is the day I will be exposing a story that I believe a lot of people can relate to.

Cherry entered college

In the begining everything was fine, met friends and within there was a special girl that was very alike in terms of working, fact that made projects super easy at the time and with the best grade always. Of course we partnered for everything, it was the best choice, wasting less time working and getting ultimate results, yup! It was good.

What I'm about to say might sound like bragging but as someone has told me:

You don't have to apologize for success, not when you have fought for it and worked you ass off to get what you have~

- I've always been an excellence student, yes, always, my parents raised me with that purpose in mind actually so, rivals tend to come on the way in order to take your first place and smile above you, now to add a bit more, I am very competitive in all matters, and want to win all the time (who doesn't?) and this girl presented to me as the same. She is very very competitive and will literally do anything to get what she wants. Either way our grades were always really the same, so we were practically the perfect TEAM.

Time passed and...turns out Cherry fell in love, and love has a cost sometimes... it all went perfect but on the journey, there were some challenges for da relationship to grow and remain as beautiful as it is at the moment (Ha! spoiler!). Let me tell you, Cherry is very emotional, her feelings are intense most of the time and there is no way to stop her from crying when she really is hurt. I have mentioned in TRUST ISSUES: PART I a bit of the story or some effects of it, at least the ugly side.

So, considering a lingering sadness

...and growing ache in roots of jealousy (obviously potentialized by real facts and events) this specific friend became a shoulder to cry on, since she was pretty much the one I had to spend three quarters of my day with -we had all our classes together- and she really listened.

At this moment of tranquility now I realize that many of her consolation speeches were mostly adding to the pain, they were not improving in any way, but rather depressing and making me doubt even more of what was going on.

This became eviden after my storm was over and happiness took over, since Cherry told her about all of the cute and fun stuff that happened regarding the painful situation and her reaction was pretty much cold stone and she instantly began to remind me all the bad aspects that his particular person has, how I didn't got what I wanted specifically, how this could lead to failure, how the other girl would never go away and well... reminding me all of the bad and no, no, it was not in a sense of hey girl be careful, I don't want him to hurt you again, no, it was said with such a tone that made me feel weird, even uncomfortable.

Why wasn't she happy that I finally was?

Throughout our college journey competition was evident as I said, but pretty normal actually, in my head love and growing up internally was a priority, because I consider these experiences one of a kind, the ones that help you learn more about yourself and guide your path towards a true destination, along maturity and tranquility in the overall life scenario. After my second semester breakdown due obtaining a B that would bring my GPA down by a tiny important bit - that in the end didn't matter at all- I realized there was more to worry about and the grading process is not fair at all for anyone! You can get an A with plenty methods that do not require learning for real, but let's say that while I had fun and relaxed a bit, she struggled a bit more with the love part.

My friend had a tough experience

That could all be solved by propper communication but at the moment we both suffered, but in her case studies were number one priority, above anything else and it was obvious she loved to beat everyone in the class, not in the best way we must add...

To make it shorter, this friend made it obvious that it was all good and magic when I was beneath her, in grades, crying over heartbreak, getting fatter even! but aslong as she had it "better" our so called friendship that well was mostly just partnership, was gonna remain the same. When my life turned around and got finally lovely, she started to leave and to be honest it may be one of the best things that happened during my college days.

I cried over this, yes I did, because no matter what we had, it was a huge part of my life aswell and suddenly breaking all contact was not really the way I expected things to go, and as a villain, which makes it worse, when literally all I did was study, go to work and spend time with my loved man. It came as a shock but all we lived, it became clear to me that she wasn't really a nice energy to keep around, she was the opposite of it, always expecting me to be down or at least not above her. Many would say that it was not the case and I made it up, that is how social life works, everyone makes up things about events that aren't even part of their life, creating unnecessary rumours and unreal details.

After she left me

...cutting all contact we ever had, my struggle to survive without a partner to share work or free time in between classes was hard, but after realizing how bad our energies were together, how the interaction added no good to self development and greatness, then my soul was finally in peace, there was no pain, no tears, no late night projects, no drama, and most of all, there was no one to bring me down anymore, no one inserting doubt in my life.

Currently I spend my days working, lazying around and meeting friends, spending also a ridiculous amount of time dedicated to my love. In general it is all about getting better, enjoying life and remember these situations happen, we change, we are dynamic creatures that are in constant change, so I'm not surprised by that and can only learn with the experience, remembering all the good times we had together and expecting she feels the same way, living life to its fullest, with no regret or bad energy involved, I wish her all the happiness~

For all the cherries going through a situation like this

It all goes better, if your friend leaves, remember it is not your fault, we change all the time and it is most likely that you both do not need each others energies at the moment and to experience a different light is always part of life.

Remember all the good times and learn through this.

Cry all you want & need, even if you weren't truly friends, a partner always touches the heart.

Enjoy yourself: It is time to discover what you are in the most RAW state, explore all of your senses,time to reset and find

🍒🍒🍒

3:43 PM No comments

4:55 PM No comments

Hello & Welcome to a cherry post that this time, will tell you how one afternoon ...

As a 13/14 year old girl, life did not had terrible complications, but it started to crumble with the surprise of depression alongside a growing eating dissorder. I was very sad, cried in school, nobody ever worried too much, not enough to actually figure out it was more serious than hormonal changes.

I hated my body, surrounded by a 60cm waist mother, a grandma that bought waist trainers for me when I was only eleven and the usual social pressure comming from already skinny friends, my mental health started deterioring, restricting my food intake, getting into self injury and a bad community of ANA's that were not helpful at all, at least in making progress or recovering.

This summes up a bit from my early teenager years. Rock music calmed me a lot, but most of it would be the one that comes with sad lyrics or dramatic lyrics, yup! a slight dramatic genre of it, sad ballads, sad rock, sad and angry metal, That and even more! So, my daily inspiration was not the best to stay on track with recovery, or actually trying it for real! Indulging in sad melodies everyday was definitely not the way to happy state (at least for my case).

One Saturday afternoon while browsing Youtube videos, watching some performances of my rock bands and exploring everything I could, the section called "videos being watched right now" caught my attention. It was a pink thumbnail with girls in it, to the date, the reason of why I cliked that video remains unknown, but it led to a significative point in life that would change it all.

Here I present you the first K-pop video that shook my mind

❤

The song might not be the greates musical discovery, but it surely had nothing to do with any sadness or feeling that evoked it. It was just fun and not at all tiring, in fact, it made me want to learn their dance and sing along even though the lyrics are in korean and at the time I only understood english. That video led me to explore more, first I searched for more material of the beloved Wondergirls (sadly now disbanded) and I found a range of groups that had a diversity of charms to offer. A lot of people say k-pop groups are all the same, but believe me if you look past prejudice and actually look at them, you will eventually know k-pop has a ton of styles within, not being globed by a certain way.

Back to my story, this little girl started to follow their activities, browsing through multiple korean sites, videos and lyrics (romanized of course) leading me to grow interest not only in k-pop, but in Korea itself. Due that, I learned how to read their alphabet, to pronounce and sing propperly.

Culture has always been an interest of mine, I read a lot and investigate about a ton of them online so, Korea became my focus and I learned even more about it through, guess what! Variety Shows! Learning vocabulary and mannerisms became way easier with them on my side and this culture showed me a side of life that can really affect everyone's lives in a sweet positive way.

If you know about Korea, you must know already that self-growth, hard-work, constance and everyday upgrade are vital components of life over there. Having this in mind, even though my eating dissorder wasn't cured magically, it was certainly re-directing itself to a more positive light, having me eat healthier foods like: sweet potatoes, lettuce (kimchi influenced), milk, even meat! I was going through a vegetarian period and cut out meat but watching shows of koreans eating it simply made my mouth water :3

From this day my discipline totally upgraded, i learned dances (I still know the steps for the song above), korean language, korean culture, history and even geography! Wondergirls became my beloved girlgroup and even though there are hundreds of them now and they disbanded recently, they're always gonna be in my heart. I sincerely think that you can make the best out of any hobby such as dancing k-pop, watching variety shows and more into a really nice activity that also brings something to your own life.

My depression was not magically healed or gone, but it got way better, this songs helped me get a different perspective, everything was happier, videos made me dance and workout and overall be a happier girl in my everyday life, even now when I'm blue and need a hype I can always trust some k-pop to brighten my day!

I hope others can have this experience and get to know more than what meets the eye and not only stay with music and idols, but go beyond and explore this beautiful culture.

🍒🍒🍒

4:49 PM No comments

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